Good lord, my will power at the moment is terrible – so I have taken to an avoidance strategy with things that just by some sort of magic end up in my mouth (there is a sexual innuendo in there, I know)
The things I shall be avoiding are (in not particular order):
1. Mugg and Bean on the move – WHY ARE YOUR MUFFINS AND COFFEES SO DELICIOUS! WHY!
2. Chuckles – When the gods cry tears of happiness, Woolworth’s catches them, packages them and sells them as Chuckles, best 40 odd ronds you will possibly ever spend.
3. Cupcakes – Any kind, any type, any where, my mouth is a slut for Cupcakes
4. Cake – Go away, why are you so delicious, was it because you were invented by the Gods? Zeus, this one is on you.
5. Milk – Get away from me with your creamy goodness, you make my mouth happy and my hips sad. Be gone, heathen
6. Peanut Brittle – One does not not simply walk past peanut brittle, if you can, show me your ways – also Fudge
7. Mango Strips – Don’t let the MANGO fool you, those tasty bastards are covered in sugar, which is why they taste so so so good!
8. Bread – I will not longer be making sammichs boys, make your own
9. Frozen yoghurt – this pains me because it’s summer and the perfect way to spend Summer is chillaxing with your mates sharing some laughs over some FroYo – not for me, na ah!
10. Brownies – a certain friend makes the most delicious brownies on earth, she is no longer allowed to mention them to me or let me be in the same vicinity as them. You know who you are, friend!
I shall be avoiding all these things till I am Heidi Klum – I am so close I can taste it!